Why Not Me?

'And God Appeared to him in the plains of Mamre.'(Genesis 18:1)

This week's Torah portion, Vayera, opens with God "visiting" Avraham and "Appearing" to him (in some way), after Avraham circumcised himself and his children. There is a powerful story told of the 5th Lubavitcher Rebbe, Shalom Dov Ber (lived 1860-1920). When he was 4 or 5 years old, he came home from school crying. His grandfather the Tzemach Tzedek (the 3rd Rebbe), asked him what was wrong. Unlike perhaps the children of today, who may have been sad over not receiving the right version of play station for their birthdays, little Shalom Dov Ber had a different problem. "It's not fair!" He cried. "How come God revealed himself to Avraham, but not to me!?" After a moment, his grandfather answered him: "When a Jew, at 99 years old, decides to have a circumcision, to him deserves that God appear to him." And the child understood and stopped crying.

How did this answer pacify the child? And what can we learn from it in our lives today? Let's look first at his age. "5 years old" represents - not only youth in years - but in understanding. We today may not cry for spiritual elevation at 5 years old, but spiritually, many of us are at the level of "5 years old" - far removed from feeling God in our daily lives like we could. We too can cry out to God: "How come you haven't revealed yourself to me more? Show me that you are involved and care about my daily life and struggles, in an easily apparent way!" More than that: We can demand that God reveal himself to us as he did to Avraham! As it says: "Each Jew is obligated to say: "When will my deeds reach the level of my forefathers, Abraham, Issac and Jacob?" (Tana Devei Eliyahu Rabbah Ch. 25)

But what was so great about was Avraham did that he merited such a revelation? Avraham, at this point in his life, had changed the world around him as much as humanly possible, eductaing and refining all that he came in contact with about God and living a moral life. He could have sat back and relaxed; "Look what I've accomplished!" Instead, when God asked him to take another leap, he did so, leaving the ocnstraints of his ego behind. And through this act of willingness to grow, to always grow higher, no matter what plateau he may have reached, is why Averaham merited a higher revelation from God. We too must never be satisfied with our achievements, but must always desire to grow morally and spiritually, working to achieve more. Through the act of circumcision, Avraham completed the turning of his body into a mitzvah - a living vehicle for God's Infinite reality in a finite world. As we refine the world around us and our inner world, may God appear to us in turn, as he did to our forefather Avraham.

Shabbat Shalom!