B”H
‘Marriage is the greatest degree of joy that human beings can find in their lives.’ - The Lubavitcher Rebbe
There is an unfortunate reality that has developed in our modern day society, surrounding the topic of marriage and its success rate. Understandably, much of America and the world at large, today looks at the prospect of marriage in a bit of a more pessimistic, or cautious, perspective. However, the truth of the matter is, as seen through the eyes of Torah, marriage is the point at which a human being can finally reach his/her true self - to become whole.
The mystical teachings of Torah teach us, that one’s soul begins in shamayim (heaven) as a complete being. Before one’s soul descends to this world, it is divided in half. Its “soul-mate” descends to the world at another time, in another place, and until re-uniting, remains incomplete - half a being. Until marriage we’re half of who we really are!
NOW, as exciting a prospective as re-uniting with our “other half” first appears, it’s very easy for this feeling to die down. “So many marriages aren’t very happy!” “Didn’t you hear 50% of marriages in America fail!?”
True. But the problem is that we Jews need to have a truer, deeper perspective on what life is really all about. Our souls descend to this world in order to be a shining light “onto the nations” - to affect the world around us and form it into a dwelling place for G-d, beginning with our very own homes. To create such a lovely environment, we have to have a mate with the same ideals as we have - the same general view on life. When that is intact, then other challenges that arise can be overcome.
But when one’s primary focus is on physical attraction and good looks w/out identifying deeper values and goals, problems can arise.
“What are your goals in life?” “What type of household would you like to create?” “How many children do you envision having?” “What type of life do you want to live?” Is this the man or woman that I want to create a beautiful atmosphere and life with?
Before dating, and moving in together, and definitely before marriage, we need to have A's to these questions. We for sure need to place our emphasis on the right things. Beauty ages, youth wanes; but soul, personality, values - stay. To quote the end of the song sung in honor of the Jewish woman on Friday night before Kiddush, known as ‘Aishes Chayil’- ‘a woman of valor’:
“Charm is deceptive and beauty is naught; a G-d fearing woman is the one to be praised.”
Attraction is for sure important, but instead of looking firstly on the outside-in (body then soul), we need to first look inside-out. Then it’s less likely for the physical attraction and thrill to cover over issues and problem 'clues' that could arise in the future.
So we need to keep our original excitement, and sustain it always, to always fuel our love. But we must have our values fixed in the right place before choosing our partner and embarking on the beautiful voyage which is love and marriage. The Torah and its values help guide us to form the true and lasting values needed to live an enriching and fulfilled life.
Here’s some words from the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Menachem M. Schneerson, about the beauty and joy of marriage:
Love is an emotion that increases in strength throughout one’s life. It is sharing and caring, and respecting each other. It is building a life together, a unit of family and home.
The love that you feel as a young bride is only the beginning of real love. It is through the small, everyday acts of living together that love flourishes and grows. And so, the love you feel after 5 or 10 years is a gradual strengthening of bonds.
As two lives unite to form 1, with time, one reaches a point where each partner can no longer visualize life without his mate by his side. - (from a private audience)
I extend my heartfelt wishes to you that your wedding take place in a fortunate and good hour and with mazal tov. May you construct a Jewish edifice on the foundations of Torah and Mitzvos.
Understandably, it need not be emphasized that on a deeper level marriage means that chassan (groom) and kallah (bride) jointly embark on constructing a most joyous life & an edifice that endures for many, many long and happy years.
It Is self-understood that it is of primary and crucial import that the foundation of an edifice be constructed of the most durable material possible, material that is able to withstand the changes and havoc that can be wrought by changes of temperature & moisture, by an earthquake, and so on.
The same holds true as a Chasson and Kallah embark on building a life together [and lay the foundations for that life]. This joint life is to be founded on the foundations of Torah and Mitzvos, the strongest materials in existence.
These, then, are the vessels through which a couple receives G-d’s Blessings for a truly joyous life. May G-d Bless you as previously stated with a mazal tov and [with the ability to construct] an everlasting edifice on the foundations of Torah & Mitzvos.
- (Letter of the Rebbe)
The marriage of every couple is connected to the ultimate marriage between G-d and the Jewish people that will be consummated in the Era of Redemption. - (Talk of the Rebbe in 1991)
If not already married, may we all be Guided by Hashem to find our soul mates, and may we all be blessed to have a successful, harmonious marriage, building a beautiful household that is a source of warmth and comfort to all who enter.
Shabbat Shalom!
Daniel
P.S. for more Jewish thoughts on marriage, see the amazing site:
http://www.chabad.org/generic_cdo/aid/448429/jewish/Finding-Your-Soulmate.htm
Monday, June 15, 2009
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Is Torah true? Prove it!
B"H
From this Thursday night until Sat. night-Jewish people around the world will be celebrating the holiday of "Shavuot." Shavuot commemorates the time, a few thousand years ago (3,321 to be exact),
that G-d Rested His Presence on the Mtn. of Sinai, in the Egyptian desert, and Spoke the 10 Commandments to the Jewish People.
Now in any other religion, like Christianity, Islam, Mormanism, Buddhism, you name it, the entire philosophy, code of law, and religion are all based upon ONE individual claiming to have had a revelation of G-d - that he alone has the new path for the world to follow (christianity claims 12 saw jesus come back). Why don't they claim more people witnessed such a revelation, to give more authenticity? Well simply, b/c it may be that other people will disagree and argue that such a thing never happened.
In Judaism, we claim that over 3,000,000 men, women, and children-our ENTIRE people-witnessed 1st hand the revelation of G-d and the Giving of the Torah. EVERY major religion acknowledges this revelation as the true original path that G-d Instructed, but that G-d was Angry at us later on & Changed his mind and chose a new people [eventhought throughout the Torah it says "You will ALWAYS be my people, even when you sin"] - hey, go figure.
No time, anywhere near that time, was there any dissenting opinions of Jews that such an event never happened (and as you know, 2 Jews=3 opinions). I don't know about you, but I wouldn't keep kosher or separate from my wife for a week every month if it wasn't 100% true. Not only that, but we were exiled throughout the world (Africa, Europe, Far East, you name it) and the text of the Torah and its tradition NEVER altered. The Torah I have in CA, is the same in Israel and China. Now you might say,
"that was over 3,000 yrs. ago! Come on, how do you know that really happened??"
Well, for starters, if you think about it, if parents told their children about what they saw at the revelation on Mt. Sinai, and they to their children, etc. (let's say when the parents were 60 and their child 20) - there has only been about 80 generations since the giving of the Torah!
And throughout this time, throughout our history, Jewish mothers and daughters, fathers and sons, have sacrificed their lives for this very belief - that the Torah was given to us. Jews who love life (חי is definitely one of Jew's favorite words. In my yeshiva, the word "L'chaim!"-'to life' is used QUITE often :) were tortured, and saw their own children tortured, in Ancient Israel, in Spain, Eastern Europe, etc. on a constant basis throughout time. "Just give up your religion!" That's all. And we won't kill your child. YOU have to have had a very strong tradition passed down from your parents, to be so strong and resolute in your belief.
The Rabbis note, that even after the 10 plagues and the splitting of the sea, after ALL the miracles that G-d Had performed for the Jews in the desert, the Jews didn't truly believe in G-d, until He revealed Himself and Spoke directly to them. They wanted proof! No games! we're not the people that follow blindly. G-d Understood this, and therefore Revealed Himself to us.
As we commemorate this amazing event of Shavuot, let's celebrate it with the praise of Hashem that He Gave us such a true and beautiful way of life; a book that teaches us how we can connect to the infinite. To learn G-d's own diary.
Our Rabbis tell us, that G-d's Coming to the Jewish people on Mt. Sinai, was like a groom coming to meet his bride. And the Torah is the bride's ring, which connects us to Hashem forever.
Wishing you a happy Shavuot! Let's receive the Torah anew this year - internally & with joy.
-Daniel
To learn more about the holiday, see:
http://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/32625/jewish/Insights.htm
From this Thursday night until Sat. night-Jewish people around the world will be celebrating the holiday of "Shavuot." Shavuot commemorates the time, a few thousand years ago (3,321 to be exact),
that G-d Rested His Presence on the Mtn. of Sinai, in the Egyptian desert, and Spoke the 10 Commandments to the Jewish People.
Now in any other religion, like Christianity, Islam, Mormanism, Buddhism, you name it, the entire philosophy, code of law, and religion are all based upon ONE individual claiming to have had a revelation of G-d - that he alone has the new path for the world to follow (christianity claims 12 saw jesus come back). Why don't they claim more people witnessed such a revelation, to give more authenticity? Well simply, b/c it may be that other people will disagree and argue that such a thing never happened.
In Judaism, we claim that over 3,000,000 men, women, and children-our ENTIRE people-witnessed 1st hand the revelation of G-d and the Giving of the Torah. EVERY major religion acknowledges this revelation as the true original path that G-d Instructed, but that G-d was Angry at us later on & Changed his mind and chose a new people [eventhought throughout the Torah it says "You will ALWAYS be my people, even when you sin"] - hey, go figure.
No time, anywhere near that time, was there any dissenting opinions of Jews that such an event never happened (and as you know, 2 Jews=3 opinions). I don't know about you, but I wouldn't keep kosher or separate from my wife for a week every month if it wasn't 100% true. Not only that, but we were exiled throughout the world (Africa, Europe, Far East, you name it) and the text of the Torah and its tradition NEVER altered. The Torah I have in CA, is the same in Israel and China. Now you might say,
"that was over 3,000 yrs. ago! Come on, how do you know that really happened??"
Well, for starters, if you think about it, if parents told their children about what they saw at the revelation on Mt. Sinai, and they to their children, etc. (let's say when the parents were 60 and their child 20) - there has only been about 80 generations since the giving of the Torah!
And throughout this time, throughout our history, Jewish mothers and daughters, fathers and sons, have sacrificed their lives for this very belief - that the Torah was given to us. Jews who love life (חי is definitely one of Jew's favorite words. In my yeshiva, the word "L'chaim!"-'to life' is used QUITE often :) were tortured, and saw their own children tortured, in Ancient Israel, in Spain, Eastern Europe, etc. on a constant basis throughout time. "Just give up your religion!" That's all. And we won't kill your child. YOU have to have had a very strong tradition passed down from your parents, to be so strong and resolute in your belief.
The Rabbis note, that even after the 10 plagues and the splitting of the sea, after ALL the miracles that G-d Had performed for the Jews in the desert, the Jews didn't truly believe in G-d, until He revealed Himself and Spoke directly to them. They wanted proof! No games! we're not the people that follow blindly. G-d Understood this, and therefore Revealed Himself to us.
As we commemorate this amazing event of Shavuot, let's celebrate it with the praise of Hashem that He Gave us such a true and beautiful way of life; a book that teaches us how we can connect to the infinite. To learn G-d's own diary.
Our Rabbis tell us, that G-d's Coming to the Jewish people on Mt. Sinai, was like a groom coming to meet his bride. And the Torah is the bride's ring, which connects us to Hashem forever.
Wishing you a happy Shavuot! Let's receive the Torah anew this year - internally & with joy.
-Daniel
To learn more about the holiday, see:
http://www.chabad.org/library/
Monday, May 11, 2009
The Small drops of water - A True Story
B”H
2,000 yrs. ago, in the holy land of Israel, there lived a Jewish man named Akiva.
Akiva worked for one of Israel’s richest men, Kalba Savua.
Akiva labored honestly and with great alacrity, amassing much wealth for his master,
And gradually became very esteemed in his eyes.
Now Kalba Savua had a daughter named Rachel.
As the days passed, Rachel began to notice Akiva’s great qualities,
and went over to speak with him.
As they discussed matters, topics moved to belief.
“I’m a simple Jew,” said Akiva. “I work honestly and belive I’m doing the right thing.”
“But Akiva, as a Jew it’s vital that you learn Torah as well!
You could do it if you tried!” Rochel pleaded.
Akiva shrugged his shoulders and went back to his work.
He really liked Rachel, but didn’t believe he could ever conquer the vast ocean of Torah Wisdom.
He had never even studied the Alef-Bet!
Rochel saw through Akiva’s demeanor, and knew he had amazing potential.
One day, Rachel made a proposal to Akiva:
“Akiva, I will marry you on one condition. That you go and learn in yeshiva.”
Akiva was stuck. He loved Rachel, but on the other hand felt he couldn’t begin to learn now.
He was already 40 yrs. Old!
That afternoon, Akiva took a stroll in the forest, to ponder his decision.
As he walked and walked, deeper into the forest, he happened upon a small stream.
Next to it rested a large boulder. What caught Akiva’s attention however,
Akiva stood mesmerized as he noticed the effects these tiny drops were having on this
humongous boulder. The drops, over an extremely long period of time, had made a hole,
penetrating the boulder’s “rock-hard” surface! Akiva thought to himself:
‘If tiny drops of water, through continuous effort,
can penetrate this boulder, surely I, Akiva, can penetrate through the vast sea of Torah.
Akiva returned and married Rachel.
Years later, Rabbi Akiva returned home with 24,000 of the world's greatest students.
Nearly every single Jew has heard of the great “Rabbi Akiva.”
Rabbi Akiva is one of the greatest expounders of Torah to have ever graced this earth.
How did he do it!?
How did he go from Akiva, the middle aged laborer, with no knowledge of Judaism whatsoever,
to perhaps the greatest teacher our people have ever had?
He believed in himself. And he worked hard.
He didn't see the boulder that faced him,
but rather the small drops.
One letter, one word, one verse, one page.
One step at a time.
This true story of a remarkable Jewish figure in our history, should inspire us all; to always believe in ourselves and know our abilities. To never give up and never to be ashamed to say “I don’t know.” To start from the beginning and work our way up. This is certainly true for all areas of our lives. But specifically in our lives as Jews. Regardless of our observance of the Mitzvot or knowledge of the Torah, we must know, with a certainty, that we can always start learning! (Rabbi Akiva didn’t even have the access of internet to learn!) {hint hint: Chabad.org}
We must know that we can always grow in our spiritual lives-all it takes is a bit of will and courage to explore the beautiful wisdom of our Torah and our heritage.
[During this financial slide, it's interesting to note a teaching of The Lubavitcher Rebbe, that through learning Torah, one gains in all areas of his life, and is blessed not only spiritually, but materially & physically as well. As we see with Rabbi Akiva, who became extremely wealthy after learning in yeshiva...food for thought ]
Anyways, if Rabbi Akiva could start learning the alphabet at 40,
I guess it’s never too late for us!
Good luck!
Daniel
P.S. Monday night & Tuesday commemorate “Lag B’Omer”, the day of the passing of Rabbi Akiva’s Greatest student, “Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai.” Jews across the world will celebrate it, with bonfires and many other customs. See your local shul for details.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)